Thursday, 6 September 2012


I don't know if it's because I'm feeling a bit low on energy, and as a result, grumpy (in general, not about anything specifically), but it's making me more than a little annoyed about stuff.  Stuff that would mildly irritate me usually but wouldn't cause me to react in the way I feel the need to right now.

For example.  I feel really cross about this...

I noticed on twitter, a conversation between two friends.  A man and a woman.  both married.  It was a typical twitter-friends type of conversation between members of the opposite sex with too much time on their hands - lightly flirtatious with a hint of over familiarity - the sort of conversation that social media so readily accommodates between two people who hardly know each other really but consider themselves friends due to their regular contact.

The woman made a joke about the man requiring a 'pass' to go out for a drink.  The suggestion of course being that the man's wife would need to begrudgingly agree to this and 'grant her permission' for the man to be go out.   The man happily played along.  Which to me, just made him seem a bit tragic really. 

Of course, I realise this goes on all the time - in real life too not just in the online world.  I've probably participated in similar conversations myself.  And I know that certain friends of ours have teased The Husband for choosing to not go out as much - or to bail out early on nights out - since we became a couple not to mention now that we are living within the limits of life with children.  Funny that they have never felt the need to tease me in quite the same way.

I'll be honest, despite the seemingly harmless jokiness of it all.  As a woman.  A mother.  A wife.  And at that, one who hasn't had a night out for about a year and a half. It makes me furious that this attitude still prevails.  The 'little wife' at home allowing her 'hard done to husband' out to 'play'. 

Why on earth the Husband in question wants to play along with this is beyond me.  Is it me, or is he basically depicting what in realilty is probably a perfectly balanced and happy equal relationship and marriage, as one that is sadly lacking.  It's akin to the old-style mother-in-law jokes of comedians well past their sell-by date.

On a more serious note, it makes me feel sorry for his wife.  It would seem that this man is so keen to play along with his online friend that he's happy to be disloyal to the woman he has committed to spending his life with, happy to make it sounds as if she, and their relationship, are far from what they could be.

Or maybe I'm wrong and his wife is actually a controlling bitch who doesn't like him to go out.  In that case then good luck to him.

An over-reaction on my part?  Possibly. Maybe I just need to get out more.  Perhaps I should be asking The Husband for a pass? ;)

1 comment:

  1. I know what you mean but I don't know why. I mean I can't put my finger on it. I see it as a bit of harmless fun, playing along that the wife is the boss but I agree with everything you say. If a wife were to joke that she's only allowed out on rare occasions when her husband grants his permission, we'd all be horrified. Strange isn't it?